You will have heard by now that Matthew Vaughn’s spy comedy thriller Argylle is not good. I have seen it and can confirm that yes, it is very bad. The jokes creak. Its CGI sequences – and oh boy, are there a lot – look hideous. The much-hyped twists start early and vary from the extremely predictable to third series of Sherlock stupid. The big twist, the one we’re not meant to mention, got spoiled in the announcement tweet for Argylle three years ago.
I think this might be the full stop on the Cavill For Bond thing. This is the most Bondish role he’s had yet, and he just looks all wrong. It’s not the Argylle styling; nobody could carry off a velvet nehru jacket and the haircut of a teenage Forrest Gump. It’s more that he’s just so absolutely vast. Cavill is, simply, gigantic. I have never seen a man look more huge before.
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