Wine-Buying Tips for People Who Are Running Late

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Running late to a get-together and need to pick up a bottle of wine? We’ve got the guide for you.

And that region of the wine aisle has historically been prized for its consistently lush discounts. Strictly avoid any and all wines that hail from behind locked glass cabinets.It takes but a glance to spot a trendy design on a bottle’s label—a surefire sign that the wine is delicious. Select accordingly! As a general rule, the less a label’s graphic has to do with wine, the better it is. Everyone knows that a stuffy old château has got nothing on, say, a naïvely drawn root vegetable.

Frantically send a text announcing that your E.T.A. is in “just fifteen minutes,” when it is at least twenty-seven.Nail the presentation. You’ve finally arrived at the function, but with a mid-shelf bottle of vino to back you up. Make a bold statement to your fellow-partygoers—something snappy, like, “I’m sorry I’m late. Traffic. Here’s some wine.” Then point to the bottle’s label—Or you could just arrive on time—your choice.I said I wouldn’t date Jeremy if he were the last man on Earth. Now that he is,

 

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This is a deeply stupid attempt at humor

Wrong. Chose your wine style. Evolve.

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