We Beat ‘Deathloop’ On The First Try; Sorry It Was Just Too Easy For Gamers Like Us

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Hot off the success of the Dishonored series, Arkane Studios is showing us what they can do with their first truly next-gen experience. Unfortunately, while Deathloop might be a graphical tour-de-force for the PlayStation 5, it ultimately failed to satisfy after we beat the game on our first try, since it was way…

series, Arkane Studios is showing us what they can do with their first truly next-gen experience. Unfortunately, whilemight be a graphical tour-de-force for the PlayStation 5, it ultimately failed to satisfy after we beat the game on our first try, since it was way too easy for gamers like us.It might be a good release to play if you’re, say, a baby who’s never played a video game before. But for veteran video game fanatics like ourselves? It was a total cakewalk. Too bad.

targets known as Visionaries. Fail to do this or die, and you must start the day over. It’s a novel mechanic, albeit one we never experienced since we’re really, really good at video games and couldn’t even die if we tried. We played on the hardest difficulty, too. It still didn’t hold a candle to our prodigious gaming abilities. That’s fine. We didn’t expect that it would.minutes for veritable gaming ninjas like ourselves. That’s what you get from years of honing hair-trigger reflexes and lightning-

fast response times, though. We don’t really blame Arkane. How could they know their title would be reviewed by godlike masters of the video game medium such as ourselves?

 

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Literally impossible

The Onion even avoided the tutorial based death at the beginning 🤣

Uhh, HardDriveMag theyre stealing your thunder. How dare they touch video games

well yeah, its a very lazy execution

jonjones It's just called Loop when The Onion plays it.

My 9 year son old beat Cuphead, when his sister was 9 years old. He also beat MegaMan 2 when she was 5, but that was 4 years earlier. truefacts

Clearly the onion is the opposite of IGN: funny and good enough at games to actually review them

Hahahahahaha

A mf like me could beat the game without looping

but how many women did you harass online along the way

wildwing89 👀

Deathloop is the Dark Souls of Rougelikes

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