L.A. Affairs: She turned me down because she wanted me to ask her out again

We had been dating for three years when he finally told me he didn’t believe in the institution of marriage. “Why do women always want marriage?” he said.

So there I was at the Swiss Bakery at Van Nuys and Ventura boulevards at the appointed date and time. But Susanne was not. Her mother, Heidi, greeted me warmly and explained that Susanne was having car trouble.Then I heard Heidi talking in hushed tones on the phone: “He’s a very nice man. Now you get down here right away.” A few minutes later, Susanne appeared. We went to the recital. Walking back to the car after the concert, we broke the ice with our first kiss.

I told her I thought I was being respectful of her considered decision rather than badgering her and jeopardizing my daughter’s music classes.That’s when she told me what had really happened that night: She had been visiting a friend who was a well-known movie score composer. Susanne had grown up sheltered in a close-knit family, and the little dating experience she did have ended badly.

So she did, not realizing she would be taken at her word when she said she didn’t think it was a good idea.How could I have been so stupid? My relationships in those intervening years had flared like newspaper in a fireplace and quickly turned to smoldering wisps of ash. Yet here, years ago, I had betrayed myself with moderation and good manners.

L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $300 for a published essay. Email

CA is a dumpster! It's a state completely run by Democrats and has been for years. Massive homeless problem. Trash filled streets. Failing public schools. Business fleeing CA for TX. Population fleeing with the loss of a congressional seat forthcoming. Why don't Dem's FIX CA?

thanks for this news Merry Christmas))

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