My son Charlie was born into a room filled with professionals—NICU doctors, respiratory therapists, neurologists, nurses, and residents—ready to meet his needs, gathering around my not-breathing infant and giving him breath. They incubated him and hooked him up to monitors that read his oxygen and heart rates. They fed him through a tube in his nose and then later in his belly.
It was while walking on this LifeTrail that I first noticed something strange. Little kids, probably preschool age, would run up to us and ask Charlie, “What’s wrong? Why can’t you walk?” He was obviously too big for the stroller he was in, and they couldn’t figure out why this kid who was not much younger than them wasn’t running around.
Let me stop and say, I know these parents meant well. They didn’t want anyone to do or say anything embarrassing. Kids at that age are in the lesson-learning stage where parents are constantly imparting all kinds of pearls of wisdom like:. Kids are learning what is socially acceptable and what is not. But the lesson these interactions ended up leaving us all with was thatRudeness was to be avoided at all costs.
It’s the simple act of curiosity that makes us feel a part of the world. Isn’t that how we learned to make conversation? You get to know someone by asking a question and then listening to the answer. It’s the beginning of friendships and terrible blind dates and wonderful marriages. It is how we send out feelers into the world for who our people are. But if you never ask, you will never know.There is such a stigma about possibly saying thegets said.
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