Dole Salad Kits Now Include Framed Certificate Confirming Owner Has Eaten Salad

  • 📰 TheOnion
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 22 sec. here
  • 10 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 40%
  • Publisher: 51%

Dole News

Garde Manger,Cobb Salad,Lettuce

CHARLOTTE, NC—Offering its customers a way to commemorate their consumption of a healthy and fiber-rich meal, fruit and vegetable producer Dole announced Wednesday that its salad kits now included a framed certificate confirming the bearer of the document had eaten a salad.

“By executive order of the Salad Institute of America, you are hereby recognized as the official eater of this Asian Chopped Salad,” reads one version of the certificate, which comes in an 8.5-by-11-inch cherrywood frame signed by Dole CEO Rory Byrne and is embossed with an official seal featuring a head of lettuce and the Latin phrase Comedi lactuca.

“Congratulations on eating 10 ounces of cabbage and shredded carrots with sesame honey dressing. This document is valid in a court of law to prove your consumption herewith. Thank you, and good luck with your future endeavors in the world of salad.” At lunch time, the offices of notaries public across the country were reportedly filled with people who wanted to have their certificates witnessed and notarized as well.

Garde Manger Cobb Salad Lettuce Salads Hospitality Recreation Rory Byrne The Onion

 

Thank you for your comment. Your comment will be published after being reviewed.
Please try again later.
We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

 /  🏆 724. in US

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

Popular Salad and Go concept expanding its San Antonio footprintPopular drive-thru concept Salad and Go is again expanding its San Antonio presence with a new store, this one on the city's far West side.
Source: SAcurrent - 🏆 607. / 51 Read more »

Caesar Salad with ShrimpThis quick Caesar salad recipe features sweet broiled shrimp, crunchy romaine lettuce, homemade croutons, and a tangy Caesar dressing with no egg yolks.
Source: foodandwine - 🏆 366. / 59 Read more »

Cooking with Chef Bryan - Egg and Arugula Salad with Lemon VinaigretteDiscover a refreshing, vibrant Egg and Arugula Salad with a zesty Lemon Vinaigrette that will brighten your day! This simple, satisfying dish combines nutrient-
Source: KUTV2News - 🏆 281. / 63 Read more »

Spring Green Parsley Pesto Pasta SaladA few weeks ago my father-in-law emailed me a recipe that sounded so tasty! I used it as inspiration to create this light and delicious spring inspired pasta dish. Its the perfect thing to bring to a picnic in the park or an outdoor BBQ - the fresh flavor of parsley along with the garlic is a delightful combination.
Source: ModernMom - 🏆 118. / 63 Read more »

Fresh Finds: Spicy veggie salad with datil pepper dressing recipeMJ, manager of Murray Hill Farmers Market, joined us in studio on Wednesday to share a recipe for a spicy veggie salad with datil pepper dressing.
Source: wjxt4 - 🏆 246. / 63 Read more »

Roasted Cauliflower & Garbanzo Bean Salad with Tahini Lemon DresIndulge in a vibrant and satisfying salad that’s bursting with flavor! This Roasted Cauliflower & Garbanzo Bean Salad combines tender roasted cauliflower and ga
Source: KUTV2News - 🏆 281. / 63 Read more »