Dear Abby: More and more, there are things I don’t understand about my marriage

From your description, your husband is selfish, self-centered, lacks the ability to empathize or nurture and would rather allow his “friends” to disrespect the woman he married than confront them. I hope you felt some psychic gratification from taking care of him when he so badly needed it, because it appears that is all you are going to get from this relationship.

My question for you is: How long are you willing to tolerate being treated this way? Many women would prefer to be alone than living the life you are. You deserve better than what you have been getting, and I sincerely hope you will have the courage to go for it.My youngest son and his wife invited me to come live with them in Colorado. I am 68 and retired, and was struggling to survive financially and maintain my home in Washington state.

My son was laid off from his job and has been seeking employment. He received an offer from a company in Pennsylvania. I’m about to receive a large amount of cash from the sale of my home, more money than I’ve ever had at one time. My son came to me last evening and asked me to lend him all of it for a down payment on a house in Pennsylvania. He says he will pay it back once his house in Colorado sells. He figures it could take six months to pay it back.

My alarm bells are ringing, and I honestly don’t know how to respond. I believe he has my best interests at heart, but I’m hesitant to give him every penny. Am I being silly? He has never given me reason to doubt him.you decide to give a portion of the money you receive from the sale of your home in Washington for a down payment on your son’s home in Pennsylvania, you should have plenty left over for yourself. But whatever agreement you make should be in a legal document in writing.

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