Dear Abby: Women have a lot to say to man annoyed by cellphone use

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If you start a sentence declaring you’re not a misogynist, you probably are one.

In that man’s case, make that a definite. If I had to endure his company, I’d be on my phone, too, calling an Uber to take me the heck out of there.I agree with “Ready,” but it’s not just women who do this. People of both sexes are constantly on their phones and oblivious to what’s going on around them. I’m a mom of three small children, and I love organizing play dates with other parents and kids.

I get it -- we’re all tired and long for rest time. Still, I do feel that a good conversationalist is hard to find. Sometimes I wish this technology didn’t exist. I long for a deeper connection with other humans.Speaking man-to-man, I would tell “Ready” that he has no real understanding of women. Whether or not he’s a misogynist by definition, his view of women is based solely on stereotypes and tropes. Most telling was his statement about “shopping, which is a female addiction.

My advice to him about finding a mate is to start with the basics. Make sure your appearance is well groomed and your clothes are pressed and clean and fit well. You need to be able to connect as a person. Can you speak intelligently about your work, interests, passions and goals? Can you ask questions about these topics, listen to the answers and engage in a caring conversation? If you can do that, the person is more likely to put down their phone and pay attention to you, all toward the possibility of building a relationship with you.

 

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