I am a 29-year-old woman in a healthy, loving relationship with my boyfriend of 2-1/2 years. We talk about marriage and kids and are committed to each other. We know we are each other’s special one. He recently bought a home, and we live together. My issue is with my mother. I feel she won’t be happy with me until I’m married and have children.
She and Dad met and were married within six months, so to her, any relationship that lasts longer than that without marriage or an engagement must not be the real deal. It has been extremely frustrating over the past couple of years. She slips in judgmental comments all the time and clearly doesn’t respect my relationship with the man I have chosen.
If I try to defend my life and our relationship, she says I’m too defensive and must be unhappy. If I say nothing, which has been my approach for the past six months or so, her snide comments continue. I want a good relationship with her, but I am not sure where to go from here. Marriage and kids are in our future but not for some time. We are enjoying our own timeline. Help!At 29, you are well into adulthood, so perhaps it’s time to draw the line.
I now regard her as selfish, and I can no longer bring myself to be friends with her. We all make mistakes, that’s true, but three times with no support from her is more than I can accept. I now feel we weren’t friends at all. Am I wrong? We have many dear friends who were there when we needed them. They cried with us, consoled us, brought food, stayed with us. Are my feelings valid?Where feelings are concerned, there is no “right” or “wrong.
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