Bill Belichick Announces This Final Season He Will Coach In Current Mortal Form

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FOXBORO, MA—Admitting the demands of the NFL season have worn down his temporary corporeal body, Patriots head coach Bill Belichick announced Tuesday that the upcoming season would be the last he will coach in his current mortal form. “Whether we win the Lombardi trophy or not, this will be the last season I coach while shackled to this weak, decaying sack of skin and blood,” said Belichick, who claimed that he will destroy his pathetic and degrading human form only to emerge a more terrible, potent, and destructive being than any coach or player could possibly imagine. “I just don’t think I have it in me to go another season beholden to the frail, temporary form that you weaklings inhabit. This body can no longer contain my power. Soon, humanity will see the true Bill Belichick, and they will weep with joy and terror as I run rampant across the NFL.” Belichick added that the coming of his true and final form shall usher in the prophesized thousand-year reign of the golden boy over all of football.

 

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he will perform a miracle on antonio brown

Lol great one

😂😂

I love AstralPhysics Let me know when he transforms

At what point are you guys gonna be funny? Or relevant? Or for that matter , make any sense at all?

Ascend, my prince! We simple mortals quiver and quake at news of your glorious return! No longer the King in Yellow, but draped in silver and blue. 'Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!'

whatthesean 😂

Going to leave on AB’s hot air balloon. Patriots PatriotWay PITvsNE Belichick antoniobrown

Must be fake news. There is no way Belichick admitted to being mortal.

Chad Masters incoming

Please don’t.

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