09 Jul 2019I had an emotional mini meltdown. I called my father immediately who was in Italy and I’m pretty sure he was drunk on his biking trip. I was like, ‘Dad, I made it on the NY times bestseller list!’ He was like, ‘your cookbook’s out?’ I Just said, ‘Jesus Christ, Dad!’ I remember when I first got the book in the mail and opening it up and seeing months and months of work all come together in one big piece. It’s scary but also exciting.
Absolutely. My dad and I are both very obsessive about food. We can be eating one meal and talking about the next. When we travel, the first thing we do is go to a grocery store. All I’ve wanted to do since landing here is go to a grocery store and look at pantry staples. Whenever my parents would travel when I was a kid, they would always come back with recipes rather than gifts and we’d cook.
It hasn’t been normal. I’m still trying to adjust. I only started meditating a few weeks ago and that was something I hadn’t done for years that a lot of friends suggested I do. If I walk into a room and I see someone who is sad or upset, I take on their feelings and keep them. If I get sad, I stay sad a lot longer than I need to. Same with happiness.
While I was embarrassed by my Polish heritage, I liked that I was different because I do have a rebellious nature and the fact, I didn’t belong fitted with that. It’s the idea of if you don’t belong to a certain group, they don’t have control over you, and you can free to do whatever you want. I always read weird books, I listen to strange music, I was into the darkest Jonny Cash at 12 years old. My interests were always different. With relationships, it was the same thing.
With any problem, when the conversation is with yourself, you create your own dialogue about it and often, especially in therapy, when I share things with someone else who has an empathetic ear and is non-judgmental I realise things aren’t as precious.
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