When negotiating, we need to move from win-win to win-win-win and think about the community

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Conflict can make us small. So we need to counter that by thinking big. We need to come up with audacious possibilities for outcomes that might work for everyone

Best-selling business authors Jim Collins and William Ury live in Boulder, Colo. and enjoy hiking the mountainous terrain together. On one excursion six years ago, Mr. Collins, author of, “If you had to boil your life’s work down to just one sentence you would leave behind, what would it say?”

., Venezuela and ending the civil war in Colombia - finds if he starts with the problem the conflict presents it’s easy to get lost in its details and difficulties. Instead, he likes to start by drawing an imaginary circle of possibility around the conflict containing all the potential positive ways it could unfold. Without discounting the difficulties, he makes room for the possibility there is a way out.

Since that’s a hard job, help will be needed, which comes from the community. In destructive conflict, we tend to see just two sides, battling to win. But there is a third side: The people around us who can help – family, friends, neighbours and colleagues. “It is the surrounding community who are concerned about the conflict,” he writes in his new book,. “They can step in and break up fights. They can help us calm down and go to the balcony. They can help us to build a golden bridge.

The recent scramble to find a motion on the Palestinian situation that both the NDP and Liberals could support in Parliament was widely ridiculed for its last-minute solution and the watering down of both party’s positions. But it was a fine illustration of building bridges rather than throwing Parliamentary golden grenades.

 

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