The 12 things I promise to do if I become prime minister

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It’s only a minute ago that Richard Glover decided to run, so forgive him if some of his policies lack a little detail. Nonetheless... leaf blowers, tea bags, the sale of scissors - they are all gone.

It’s only a minute ago that I decided to run for Saturday’s election, so you’ll have to forgive me if some of my policies lack a little detail. Nonetheless, here’s what I’d do if I were elected prime minister.Australia used to have a thriving culture of tea drinking. A pot was made to mark either success or tragedy. It wasn’t quite the Japanese tea ceremony, but some effort went into the thing. There’d be a little jug for the milk. A bowl for the sugar.

. Why should loyal customers, who may be a bit inattentive when it comes to price comparisons, pay more for everything? My policy: if you offer an introductory rate to attract a new customer, you should be required to offer that rate to all your customers. Even the overly loyal, dozy ones like me.Well, at least I’d ban the sale of scissors in hard plastic packaging that requires a pair of scissors to reach the pair of scissors.

People who eschew buying a clothes dryer on environmental grounds shall be prevented from constantly using the one at Nana and Pa’s place. OK, this might be a little self-interested, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the problem is more widespread than you might think.They say: “Your call is important to us”, but how important? I’d like to be told before I sign up. Is it five minutes worth of “important” or three hours of “important’?

 

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rgloveroz re Wagon Wheels - agree, and Cobbers too. But Mint Leaves seem to have gone the other way, even Allens retro ones.

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