In her defiance of statistics, my longest-living cancer patient was dignified, composed and magnanimous

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It was both moving and onerous that she trusted me with important decisions, and I treasure her observation that our relationship never felt transactional

‘She was surprised and delighted that our whole team still thought about her, and even when speaking became hard, she graciously thanked me.’‘She was surprised and delighted that our whole team still thought about her, and even when speaking became hard, she graciously thanked me.’We first met when I was pregnant and she found out she had cancer. You might think that the juxtaposition of life and death discomfits patients, but children make for a happy point of connection.

develop a singular focus to her visits: to stay alive for him. She loved him with a burning intensity that made her eyes shine and her voice quiver at the thought that he could be left without her. In her most vulnerable moments, when she couldn’t catch her breath, she expressed a fear – not of dying itself but physically suffering. For this she proposed that just as she trusted me with her life, I needed to ensure her peaceful death. All these years, I have carried this responsibility apprehensively, knowing full well how poorly end-of-life care unfolds for far too many patients.

My days contain memorable patients but I have seldom met one more composed. Over many hundreds of hospital visits, I met her husband once and her grandchild never. She came alone to receive good news, bad news and awful news, explaining that her husband had his hands full at home.Each week our editors select five of the most interesting, entertaining and thoughtful reads published by Guardian Australia and our international colleagues.

Source: Healthcare Press (healthcarepress.net)

 

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