Alone but not lonely: the solo activities that help foster connection

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Loneliness can be difficult to talk about, and even more difficult to fix. But the pathways out do not always require company

in Taiwan found that activities which allow people to experience a sense of mastery and autonomy – ie flow – are associated with decreased feelings of loneliness. In a state of flow, people become so absorbed in an activity that they lose track of time. A flow state requires a task that is ideally just challenging enough, and provides clear goals and feedback.In addition to offering short-term relief, finding solo activities you love can serve a deeper purpose.

As she entered her 50s, she decided to get back on her board, initially through attending standup paddle boarding lessons alone. Even when her first lessons triggered panic attacks, she persisted.“The beach has always had good feelings for me,” she says. From standup paddle boarding, she progressed back to surfing, and the Waves of Wellness program, a mental health charity that offers “surf therapy” – a combination of surfing and group therapy.

At first, Wynn found distraction through things like crossword puzzles and reading. But he felt a need to give back.“I’m really cautious about who and what I donate to,” he says. He spent a lot of time researching organisations, and found that animal shelters would often hold fundraisers when an animal in their care needed veterinary surgery. Spending time online seeking out and contributing to those causes became almost a hobby for him.

 

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