You’ll never be Gwyneth Paltrow — sorry Meghan Markle, Kim Kardashian

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Unlike lesser celebs, Paltrow owns her wealth, privilege and ridiculousness.

Kick up those $1,200 Celine boots, pour some bone broth infused with crushed-cricket enzymes and fire up the vagina steamer.Gwyneth Paltrow won the trial

And she didn’t even have to try on a glove — though I assume if required, it would have been a cashmere-lined, leather one from Prada. Paltrow did not escape ridicule, though. Because instead of cosplaying being poor and ordinary — maybe raiding the rack at Target for relatability points — she strode into that Utah courtroom in all her austere splendor.

 

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Can her lips be any thinner? Someone could get a paper cut kissing her.

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