What Would Your Selling Sunset Song Sound Like?

Photo: Netflix Hey, girlie boss queens, gather ’round. I’ve got a new song for you, and it goes like this: Why [clap] does all [clap clap] the music in Selling Sunset sound like … that [clap]? As a whole, the Netflix reality show following luxury real estate firm the Oppenheim Group has been aptly described as an approximation of the human experience — like someone put the words California, women, houses, hot, and money into a computer and this is what it came up with.

In the first episode of the recently released season four alone, you’ll hear songs with the following lyrics: “I’m expensive with designer taste / Can’t handle this? / Get out my face”; “Brushin’ off my shoulders / I just got a little bolder / I’m ready to go!”; “Drippin’ in confidence / Want it all, take it all / Cut like a diamond ring / Perfect in clarity.” And that’s just in the first half of episode one.

Buzzfeed News reporter David Mack recently did the Lord’s work and spoke to some of the people who work on Selling Sunset’s music. “It’s ‘gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss’ vibes, 100 percent,” said Colby Lapolla, a singer and songwriter who has written music for the show. “It’s been very funny to watch Twitter, and I feel like so many people have been talking about the music. They don’t understand that we know this is garbage.

“The phenomenon around the music is so funny,” Lapolla said. “It’s a thing, but it wouldn’t work without the ridiculous music.” And I agree. With that in mind, I’ve devised an accurate and perfect way to figure out the title of your own Selling Sunset song below. Specifically, the song that would play when you walked into one of those big, ugly houses. Enjoy, lady boss bitches!February: SlayAugust: Heyyyyy2. Last digit of your Social Security number6: Sexy Hot$0–1 million: 4.

For example, my Selling Sunset song would be called, “Vroom Vroom, Rich Money .” It would play as I stepped out of a Lamborghini that I went bankrupt in order to rent.

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