What if this boomer’s immortality thing doesn’t pan out???

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A fun read! What if this boomer’s immortality thing doesn’t pan out?

by Mary Kay Jordan Fleming— who in her day job is a professor of developmental psychology at Cincinnati’s Mount St. Joseph University— it’s about plans for immortality… and plans for if it doesn’t pan out.

For starters, I’d like to arrive in the Emergency Room escorted by some top-of-the-line EMTs. Maybe Drs. McSteamy and McDreamy from the early episodes of Grey’s Anatomy. If I’m not dead yet, give me something to live for. In addition to pain control, I’d like to be treated for constipation if necessary. This is apparently a treatment “option”… as if anyone in their right mind would select against it… and sign me up now. I think any doctor who doesn’t automatically treat a bowel blockage should be stripped, clad in a paper-thin gown, strapped to a wheelchair, and rolled briskly out the Emergency Room doors.

If I need resuscitation, in addition to the crash cart, bring a double pepperoni pizza, chocolate-covered strawberries, and tiramisu. Trust me, if I know I’m dying, one of my last thoughts will be I should have gone ahead and eaten that.

 

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