Wayne and Wanda: A colleague made a pass at me on a work trip. What do I do?

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Advice: Having a “work spouse” can be incredibly valuable, especially when a job requires long hours and time on the road. It can also be risky.

I’m part of a close work team that regularly travels around Alaska together for all-day work or sometimes overnight trips. We’re all about the same age , close knit, and hardworking. On overnight trips, we almost always grab drinks and dinner following a long day.

She knows I have a girlfriend. I know she’s seeing someone. Still, this felt like an invite to something more. I declined and made a joke about being old. When we said good night in the lobby, she caught me by surprise by kissing me on the cheek. You’ll be traveling with your co-worker again. The only way to avoid confusion moving forward is real talk. The alternative — keeping quiet — could lead to more complications. Have a candid conversation and explain that because you appreciate her as a sounding board and friend, you need to set social boundaries for both of you to protect that friendship. No doubt she’ll have opinions on the matter, so also be prepared to listen.

 

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