Or the suburbs, or peaceful protests, or strong/smart women, or subpoenas, or facts or a shortage of blonde hair dye, or a shortage of orange “bronzer” or a salad, or reading, or virtual debates, or paying taxes, or serving in the military, or showing taxes, or $420 million debt
Babylon Bee The Onion🤣🤣🤣🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 MAGA2020
Canuck2Proud hey, djt's latest rap is he alone saved suburbs! but from who, whom, what! then will we save ourselves from djt!!!! u can love him but he still can't lead us! herd immunity is his no plan, plan! Millions dead! tens of millions left to suffer! my best jml GO JOE!
cwild22
MaxBoot What I would say to that is to don’t let Drumpf reck your lives, do what is right!
besslevin I read one of your articles about POTUS. Don’t you have a conscience? He has done more for our country, booming economy, energy independence, school choice & lowest unemployment. You are the Grim Reaper. Your articles are scythes to “reap” human souls!
mehdirhasan Sucker punched by a lefty?
Want to know the advantages of a 70 inch 4k tv........ The reason the make up on his right side is so dark... when they do a close up you can catch some weird clear line on his cheek.. HE IS ON OXYGEN and they are trying to hide it
johncusack Want to know the advantages of a 70 inch 4k tv........ The reason the make up on his right side is so dark... when they do a close up you can catch some weird clear line on his cheek.. HE IS ON OXYGEN and they are trying to hide it
EgadGadzookz He STILL SICK. Go to the WH your own peril!
EgadGadzookz Look closely his right 👁 eye. This is called ptosis; a neuromuscular residual of a prior L sided CVA experienced a year ago,but (surprise, surprise)COVERED UP. Stress & fatigue,following 🦠🦠 infection in this instance, and prolonged standing & saluting unmasks.Retired CV HCP
genilin2850 Unless there's a caravan coming, then the sky is falling.
Build walls that essentially are a waste, but don’t wear masks because they are a waste and take away your American freedom. Makes sense
MaxBoot Huh, I always thought The Onion was a parody site, not a news outlet
MaxBoot
KevinMKruse ...and MINORITIES IN THE SUBURBS.
pkewer Ouch. 😂
KevinMKruse Immigrants, Muslims, healthcare, economic stimulus, taxes that help the middle class and science in general.
KevinMKruse You're supposed to do JOKE headlines, Onion.
MaxBoot And don’t forget Antifa.
KevinMKruse Recently I received an online notice that I have been put on the Trump 2020 enemy list of internet politicians. They're monitoring me over at the White House. My followers and I will always stand up for what they hate, the truth! Follow Stay Updated / Keep Watching Big Brother
MaxBoot Trump welcomes legal aliens, not illegal aliens:
KevinMKruse ‘Onion decides to be ordinary opinion piece magazine due to death of satire under Trump’
KevinMKruse This isn't even a fake headline, this is his actual plan.
KevinMKruse
KevinMKruse Why is Trump's face swollen on his right side?
Wait ... Isn't this supposed to be a sarcastic publication
Holy crap! It took me a minute because he is so heinous anyway, but He has two lumps on his right side! He’s extra orange and his right eye is droopy. Side note- his disgusting mouth literally looks like a butthole. Perhaps as an early warning of what is sure to come out of it!
Soapy_Wit_Tank the ‘fake tan’ is re applied 🧐
What's happened to the right side of Trump's face?
Femi_Sorry The real deal
This guy is a complete idiot!
SykesCharlie Yes I fear you and you stupidity.
EnigmaDayna Oh, my God. From the mouth of an insane person. Somebody criticized me yesterday for comparing trump to Hitler.
I thought you made up news . this is real.
“... Or the gays, or the blacks, or the browns, or uppity women...”
I’m afraid of his cheekbone implants. And he SHOULD sue that doctor for malpractice for that botched work. I can finally agree with him on something if he did that! Yikes 😳
belladonna85995 Bad shot or what😑 What the hell is wrong with Trumps right eye and cheek. Get the man off steroids asap😂
BradleyWhitford Ok, can someone please tell me what’s wrong with his face? What’s that bulge?
denellduck Trump to nation: Don’t let your lives be dominated by fear unless it’s from looking at my face • WTF is going on with the right side of his face ?
SamanthaJPower Or black people
BradleyWhitford Did he have another stroke?
BradleyWhitford Trump has made life so difficult for The Onion’s writers 🤣🤣 no satire can beat the real absurd mess that is the reality of the Orange ShitStain.
BradleyWhitford Don’t forget looters and rioters
SamanthaJPower ‘Don’t Let Your Lives Be Dominated By Fear Unless It’s Related To the 'Blacks'.....
BradleyWhitford The least onion onion ever.
BradleyWhitford Stroking
BradleyWhitford It's an Onion headline that sounds real... My favorite.
johncusack Time to call 911
Or debating with the opposition
johncusack His face. 🥺
Or antifa or blacks
rjber15
So true.
johncusack what's wrong with his face!! Bells Palsy? Stroke? Wtf
Or antifa. Or peaceful protests. Or a caravan. Or latinx children. Or the free press.
SamanthaJPower What's with that terrible makeup? 💄
vkhosla The most Racist old man alive in The USA.
johncusack Immigrants are not the problem. We’re all immigrants first off. Stop acting like you’re above anyone. We stole this land from Indians and did horrendous things. Treat people like you’d want to be. The problem are people who don’t and go through life with hatred/anger like trump.
johncusack what the F is wrong with his face?
mehdirhasan It’s bad when the Onion can’t find “jokes” that are actually fictional.
johncusack So you are getting out of the parody business and going hard news?
Trump has Cabin 🥵 Fever...
And women🤷🏻♀️
Femi_Sorry Only a coward picks on the least powerful
mehdirhasan Yeah! He meant . Melanie!🤔😂
mehdirhasan And fear of multi-dwelling inhabitants moving in on suburban women!
Or anything else that doesn't seem just like you!
mehdirhasan what happened to his face? he looks like elephant man.
But wait, his whole platform is fear and division. Is he abandoning fear?
kelly2277 Did trump have a stroke or Bells Palsy? He looks horrific & no amount of orange bondo will fix it.
If Covid came in on a caravan...
mehdirhasan I guess that includes his wife and in laws...fear those Russian ''immigrants''
mehdirhasan Criminal
fmanjoo Another great example of the Art of the Screwup. DJT tweeting politically oriented message of troop withdrawal from Afghanistan, without even consulting his military leaders. What was that latest medication he was taking? And has anyone even seen him walking & talking normally?
doesn’t even have to be satirical anymore. What is 2020? Lol
vickivanv And women, pretty much all women.
A truth bomb by the onion
The only fear the world has is 4 more years of you
SykesCharlie Oh my goodness! The right side of his face is hanging! 🥀
SykesCharlie Make the bad man go away!!’
😭 this is not satire
Or Corey Booker coming to a suburb near you.
SykesCharlie Looks kinda like gumby
So, we’re just ignoring the fact that Trump is doing his videos in blackface now? Why is no one talking about this? He looks like the Jazz Singer.
StantonThe3rd Maga fears so much...socialism,inner cities, tax returns...pussies.
Leslie_resists Or blacks or browns or Asians coming to your suburb. Or democrats who all want to destroy and bankrupt America. Or anyone who ever disagrees with me.
mkonnikova Replace immigrants with antifa and this could be real
SykesCharlie
fmanjoo It looks like he’s had a stroke. His right side is droopy to me. If so, it will make it much harder to fight and recover.
SykesCharlie EppAdam
MenendezRand MrAndyNgo reporting live
SykesCharlie Poor Onion. You now sound more like news than the actual news.
SykesCharlie So the onion is no longer satire?
SykesCharlie Presumably, the Central American migrant caravan has once again been sighted.
👀
SykesCharlie Ha! Perfect.
Holy shit
TheBabylonBee check out some satire!
Oh onion you're so funny. The thing is... It seems like something he has actually said. It was the 'reason' he gave for banning travel from China to here.
karendevine84 I am 69 year old women. I have never feared Immigrants, or anyone that is not the same color as myself. I am a white women that FEARS Donald Trump and his administration and CORRUPT FAMILY as well as the GOP lawbreakers and TRAITOR s that destroyed the people and the country.
Muslim terrorists are the real threat. They'll kidnap your governors and blow up your bridges.
Cover his left side of face with your hand you'll see Covid 19 affects his right side of face. He was never handsome but this is much worse looking.
The Onion reporting the actual news these past 4 years has me feeling very conflicted.
I thought this was a satire account
what's up with the right side of Trump's face?
UM that's actually not satire
Why do immigrants come here? To be subjected to racism, shot by police and suffer under the Patriarchy?
that ski-mask before the spray-paint of his face... Golden
dedalusdenaries Did someone punch his right eye/cheek?
Says the man that married two of them!
th3j35t3r Or low-income housing
Or blacks, or protesters in general. Or, for that matter, the Main Stream Media; they are hard to suppress.
john_sipher 'Or fear of half your face melting.'
th3j35t3r 'ONLY FEAR THINGS *I* TELL YOU TO FEAR! Stop fearing things stupid traitorous people tell you to fear related to MEEEEEEEE!'
th3j35t3r Is it me or is there something going on with the right eye? I don't look at him often, has it always been like that?
postsecret Tsk, very close to real news here.
the only person from the Bible trump comes close to is King Nimrod
john_sipher How long is the GOP going to tolerate this kind of damaging behavior DO SOMETHING!!
john_sipher
john_sipher Melanie hit him with the 9 iron
WasOnceLou OompaLoompaTrump
john_sipher Who is the mortician that did his makeup?
Guys, click the link of they don't get paid
All the onion does is spit facts
th3j35t3r
yeah❤️wow❤️this❤️
Never making America great again.
His face. Has he had a stroke?
it's so wild that the onion has turned into actual news now
N7IRL And socialism. Don't forget a fear of socialism. And an almost fanatical devotion to the Trump.
If you add Illegal to immigrants this wouldn't be an Onion article!
‘A nation long-united must divide. Long divided, it must fall. Then blame specific other countries for it all.’
Imagine what his actual thoughts are. Lmao. Burn them all! Oh wait, if they are part of the economy I ruthlessly criminally abuse then I can get more monies! Yaaaah.
mtheory666 Hey Onion, slander doesn't look good on you.
gassee Stop with the real news already!
Orange face is such a two face asshole!
Bigot
MalcolmAkeem_
SteveKerr Is it just me or is his face starting to look sunken in?
SteveKerr Still waiting to hear if the immigrant caravan reached the border...
Don't forget about windmill cancer, it's still out there!
Isn't the article supposed to be fictional?
bdog182 or the suburbs!
carlquintanilla True, beware of bears
...or orange paint. Damn lighting.
carlquintanilla And poor people. savethesuburbs! lol
Republicans are lizards and only know how to appeal to the lizard brain.
What's up with the eye and cheekbone
carlquintanilla Hahahaha
You can tell that, with his eye twitching and the glowing orange discoloration of what they would normally call a face but not sure what this is, he is getting ready to spew forth a bunch of propagandous lies, oh, and orange juice.
cameron_kasky Or fear of debating or fear of truth—-NDAs for Walter Reed physicians?
SteveKerr And Antifa! And protests! And environmentalists! And voting!
Unless it’s related to liberals. Then be afraid. Or Biden he is evil. The good news is God blessed him with a disease....
And liberals. Them liberals gonna get us all killed!
SteveKerr The makeup. WTF?
SteveKerr Or virtual debates.
Now this is just his actual stance
Lol accurate
jeboyt Is he melting?
This isn't satire, it's paraphrasing.
Republicans have been spreading that message for years.
Did the Onion decide reality was satire enough and just start reporting the news as is
Or socialism.
NicholasFerroni I was an immigrant
Why does he look like he is auditioning for Rocky?
Boo
Or Antifa or 'religious freedom' or 'Demoncrats' or whatever obvious boogeyman they're pushing this week
The problems is not immigrants just religious extremist, and is not like any country has an overwhelming majority of those... right?
Your content and your humor used to be thoroughly bipartisan. I feel like your mission has now changed to given the success of the Babylon Bee. It feels like you’re run out of the NYT editorial dept now.
Someone check the face before letting it out, ok The bronzer is getting a bit thick......literally. Gads, he IS an actual CLOWN !!!
He is correct. We take precautions but I’m not going to spend my life hiding in a basement with Biden.
Or black. Or an educated woman. Or just plain poor.
He should be dominated by fear of the left hook delivered to the side of his face 😳
I really liked it when was just satire, before their article started being the most accurate news out there 🤔 (This is a critique of our current state of affairs, the Onion is doing great)
horseracing4beg Dear Lord, please help us all....
Is this The Onion, or not The Onion? It's hard to tell nowadays.
😂🤣😂🤣
Or unless it's related universal healthcare. Which he claims will turn our country into Venezuela, and we will be fighting for bread.😆
That's not even satire...that's just true.
Waiting4suns He looks like
Don’t forget about all those black people that are going to move to the suburbs - Trump would like you to be afraid of them, too.
Or that’s makeup
TOO REAL.
Voting for Trump is like standing next to a wall and repeatedly bashing your head against it in anticipation of the moment when it will begin to feel good.
What the fuck happened to his face?
theluma
It's ILLEGAL immigration he has a problem with. At least get that right. Satire only works if you have the truth on your side. TheOnionSucks
And guns...and socialism...and baby killers....
He is ill so bad⋯⋯look at his face.
FLOTUS 🤔
Looks like he is wearing a Trump mask
And antifa!
He didn't mention anything about immigrants in that video. He talks about the virus you FAKE NEWS.
Okay. Thanks for the encouragement trump I'll keep protesting 🤣
Is that a brown onion under his right eyeball?
I appreciate a man that’s willing to apply pumpkin spice for the season. Looks good on him.
Stephen Miller soft porn.
Donald Trump has so much makeup on did you notice.
I rather agree with that!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
What about Anne tea fuhh?
I thought the Onion always came up with fake headlines, but this is the GOP platform IRL.
Or satanic pedovore alien reptiles!
GOT 'EM!
Is his face edited to be more orange than normal in this image? I genuinely can’t tell.
This is a good one
THIS!
Are we sure he’s not actually said this?
Another banger. +1.
Or the suburbs, or peaceful protests, or strong/smart women, or subpoenas, or facts or a shortage of blonde hair dye, or a shortage of orange “bronzer” or a salad, or reading, or virtual debates, or paying taxes, or serving in the military, or showing taxes, or $420 million debt
Fucking immigrants, taking all the kids and shooting up all of the jobs.
'The only thing we have to fear is, fear itself.. unless it's immigrants, or China, because it's all China's fault. Oh, and that well organized, terrorist group known as BLMANTIFA. Terrible people, and it's all China's fault.' - Donald Trump on drugs.
He looks great
This is supposed to be satire, man. You’re becoming the next best non-fiction writers this world has ever seen.
Spitting straight facts tho
joshbrundage
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