Several recent high-profile investigations, from the ongoing impeachment inquiry to House probes into the actions of companies like Facebook and Boeing, have put the spotlight on congressional testimony, although they represent only a fraction of people who have appeared to offer explanations or background to Congress.
Don’t be too eager to say yes to the first congressional hearing you’re asked to speak at—it’s better if you wait for the right one to come along.A calm, respectful demeanor is absolutely crucial unless you’re a Supreme Court nominee.Iowa congresswoman Abby Finkenauer is going to carve you up. Nothing you can do about it.Have some pieces of deli meat in your pocket to keep your energy up.While it is the congressman’s job to flirt with you, it doesn’t mean they actually like you.
Only tip you need: if they don’t grant you fully immunity to anything and everything, plead the 5th.
never append your statement with 'Epstein did not kill himself'
or, perhaps, just don’t show up. that seems to have been working fantastically lately 😂
Make sure you have a Thesaurus on hand to flex a big vocabulary, they will forget the whole point of having you testify with your big fancy words
'While it is the congressman’s job to flirt with you, it doesn’t mean they actually like you.' Is the best thing I've read in the whole week
Sit up straight. Talk in circles until your questioners get frustrated, and move on to another topic. I'm sorry I can't recall, I only learned of that in this mornings paper, are excellent choices.
Thought this was satire, not actual truth.
Tip 1. Just don’t show up.
'Can you tell us when you first became invisible and was there presidential extortion involved?'
Tip 1: Don't do it
Soiled armpits and flop sweat are a definite fashion no no Also make sure that no one you bring with nods their head incessantly in the affirmative
Do not lie. Simple.
Just claim immunity, bruh
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