This 'Dick Out on a Zoom Call' Story Is a Nightmare Scenario

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By now, we are all so accustomed to Zooms taking place of regular, in-person meetings that, ideally, we have figured out how to conduct ourselves while on these calls to avoid embarrassment, shame, or accidental sexual harassment. I have gotten this memo, my coworkers have too, but the one person who maybe has not is a preeminent lawyer, New Yorker writer, and CNN on-air talking head Jeffrey Toobin.\n

has suspended reporter Jeffrey Toobin. Sources tell VICE it’s because he exposed himself during a Zoom call last week between members of theToobin said in a statement to Motherboard: “I made an embarrassingly stupid mistake, believing I was off-camera. I apologize to my wife, family, friends and co-workers.”

“I believed I was not visible on Zoom. I thought no one on the Zoom call could see me. I thought I had muted the Zoom video,” he added...O... kay, Mr. Toobin! The dick was out for an undisclosed amount of time, and per this apology, Toobin thought he was not visible, and so he was doing whatever it was he was doing with the meat and potatoes, the nature of which has not yet been disclosed. This report, which I assume will be updated with more information once the full story is revealed, is tantalizingly thin—but it also serves as a cautionary tale for the rest of us.

Unfortunately, I respect and understand Clover’s opinion, but I don’t necessarily agree. Sitting still during a Zoom feels like work. Getting up from the couch and taking the computer with you to the kitchen to clean the oven while talking to your friends is a nice way to distract you from the fact that you are talking to friends on a computer screen and not in person, at a bar, screaming in each other’s faces over the music.

 

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