Things You Should Never Say To An ICU Nurse

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Your nurse is a trained professional who’s there to keep your diseased lungs working, not a waitress at Olive Garden.

Nurses can always tell when patients are trying to hide the fact that they’ve died.“Oh, hey! You were just my nurse. Pretty cool you’re in the ICU with Covid now too.”Try not to act so excited, because after all, this was your fault.

 

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Next time you are in your doctor's office waiting the obligatory 30 minutes AFTER your appointment time, take a look around. Notice EVERYTHING is a drug advertisement. Pens, notepads, calendars. They didnt become doctors to not make money.

Phlebotomists do it deeper.

Not anymore. They're afraid of prescribing painkillers now.

I miss the days when doctors asked which opioid you came in for.

Birds in nature do not wear masks, cuz they are wild birds. But, the bird that is on a man, is a kind of tame bird, which obeys his orders.

ICU? I mean, yeah, I see you, too

jesuslambsona We're at the point where I have to double take to see if this is satire or not. This is sad

Birds do wear masks and that is why it is important to not believe everything you see online .

birdsarentreal

Metal doesn't breathe.

Birds aren’t real

University of Toronto, ON, on the % of viruses let through by various face coverings. Mask of Zorro: 0% Cloth mask: 10% N95 mask: 50% Imagine it was ebola, not the flu from 2 years ago, and ask yourelf - is this level of 'safety' acceptable?

When i was younger a cute nurse wanted to give me a sponge bath..i was suspicious.

Prone here often?

How about you take my temperature the old fashioned way this time?

-'Are there any microchips in this?' -'Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and saviour, Grandfather Nurgle the Plague Lord?' -'How much are the Illuminati New World Order Population Reduction Bureau paying you?' -'Can you score some pills for me?'

icancu!

“I’d prefer it if you went in dry.”

“Why should I wear masks when birds don’t?” 🤔

'ICU, or at least I would if you weren't wearing that silly mask.'

...ξεκινάω εγώ, 'Σπανακόπιτα' 🤝

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