The official Trader Joe's frozen food power rankings

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One man's opinion on the best (and worst) Trader Joe's frozen food on the market.

This very good take on an Alsatian tarte flambée or a flammkuchen will make you feel like you’re a kid in eastern France, getting annexed all over again. It’s a crispy, buttery dough base layer smeared with crème fraîche and sprinkled with Gruyere cheese and little batons of ham.

Speaking of teeth, the bite on these frozen gnocchi is off. They are bouncy and squeaky, like a dog chew toy or a racquetball. Thankfully the prep on these, like a lot of the pastas, is easy: Dump the contents of the bag in a pan and stir.This version of the Indian chickpea dish is heavy-handed with the cumin and a little too sweet, but it’s filling and robustly spiced. It’s one of the weaker entries in the Indian food lineup at T.J.

Is it unrealistic to expect more from Trader Joe’s freezer case? Probably, but if we can’t put high standards on our multibillion-dollar conglomerates, where can we?While not sharp or garlicky enough, it doesn’t overtly offend. Like many of the T.J. pastas, they come in frozen pasta “nests” that are cooked and slowly unravel in the pan. There are a few springy clams in there, but this pasta alle vongole misses any of the rich brininess you want from the dish.

In theory, this is ingenious. In practice, it falls short. The cheese is rubbery, the broth is so-so, and the croutons are practically nonexistent, having almost completely disintegrated in the soup after 40 minutes in the oven. Is disappointing French onion soup better than none at all?I love a good latke, but I want to actively feel the shreds of potato breaking between my teeth — not the mushiness of bready batter. They crisp up promisingly in the pan, but the mealiness inside is real.

 

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Oh no... not another one of these terrible rankings.

Chicken Masala is 1

This is all wrong :( good try

Wrong about the Orange chicken. Shit it delicious

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