CLEVELAND—Praising the incredible healing power of terrible art, local moron Todd Beram credited shitty music with helping him through some of the hardest times in his pointless life, sources confirmed Wednesday.
“During some of my lowest moments, when I feel like I just want to disappear or that I can’t possibly go on, I always put on my favorite record, and for a moment, everything feels all right,” said Beram, the absolute fool of a man, who stated he felt “less alone” knowing that millions of other drooling idiots had taken comfort listening to the same insufferable songs for decades. “Whenever I hear those lyrics, it’s like someone’s reading my mind.
🙋♀️🙋🙋♂️🙋🙋♀️🙋♂️🙋🙋♀️🙋♀️
kolboyce that Khalid be hittin fr
awesomeswagdope glad SPG helps
Thanks
🤨
He’s just like me
Like the Beatles
elijahwood Why didn't you come to the conference 'Global Crisis. Time for Truth?' Millions of people invited you to speak in favor of uniting people at a time of global climate change. They also asked for money to speak. Aren't you ashamed? elijahwood LastWarofHumanity WeWant2Live
thanks for the template.
saturdaysavi0ur every weezer fan ever
HEY
robbie_txlefty
Shit
Oh no, bullseye 😂
Look I’m just gonna listen to Smash Mouth all day.
kylee_parkk
This is me
I think ElephantsStars would appreciate the last sentence in this story.
HeheWaitWhut He’s blasting Motley Crue and poison.
This is offensive to Nickelback and their fans.
This seems pointlessly hateful. What exactly is the point of this satire?
What is the commentary here though, besides Morrissey=bad?
This one time I badmouthed Maroon 5 this dude took it sooo personally and got angry with me saying “You don’t know what they mean to me! They helped me through some really tough times! So you should watch what you say!” Whatever you say man. But Maroon 5 is still hot diarrhea.
Did the author of this article just have a horrible break up with said moron?
blueminder rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring 🎵
So true treasuretrova
I feel very attacked right now.
I feel this so deeply *Siri,play some Nickelback*
kukultinhughes I can't believe the onion made an article about you
Music is important
Dave Matthews Band, man like bro...I can't even tell you bro.
I listen to good music, so this doesn't apply to me. 🙃
Im calling my lawyer , those comments i made were 'Off the record'
I feel seen. RepresentationMatters
I am very familiar with this phenomenon, my son keeps exposing me against my will to Ariana Grande and Shawn Mendez, lockdown is hell 🤣
why do I feel you're attacking Foreigner?
delete please
that cut deep
Hahahaha
KingOfBassFace Check out my soundcloud
As someone who was in high school during the nu metal era... I feel seen.
Felt
How about a trigger warning. Damn
Finally an article about me
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Source: dallas_observer - 🏆 453. / 53 Read more »
Source: NatGeo - 🏆 537. / 51 Read more »
Source: Mirror Celeb - 🏆 476. / 51 Read more »
Source: fox32news - 🏆 547. / 51 Read more »
Source: Variety - 🏆 108. / 63 Read more »
Source: chicagotribune - 🏆 8. / 91 Read more »