Seeing My Kids For Only Half The Week Sucks… Mostly

. I’ve had the other half of the week to be single Meg — to sleep in a little longer, to get errands done sans kids, and to carve out time for things that make me me. Things like writing, hanging out with friends, staying at home with my books, binge-watchingHonest answer? Yes, it is, and no, it’s not.episodes I’m rewatching? The TV screen has left-behind-hummus handprints from my toddler I have to look through in order to see the many brilliant facial expressions of Lorelai.

On Wednesday mornings, I do the impossible. I drop them off at school and head to work. This is the day when their dad picks them up and has a few days with them. Often the kids will say, “I’ll see you after school?” with hopeful eyes as I kiss their cheeks and give one more hug.

It’s their absence that pushes me into Supermom-mode. With time away — as any mom who’s ever left her kids even for a night will tell you — I’m more patient with them, more understanding, and more willing and wanting to play with them for consecutive hours after having half the week without them. I’ve had the time for self-care and “me-time.” I’m refreshed, something I know not many moms can say.

But I’m also anxious. I haven’t had the chance to hold them, to cook for them, or to have living room dance parties together in days. I won’t ever get to have them again daily. That’s a hard truth to swallow and not what I signed up for when I became a mom. When their dad and I split, 50/50 split made sense. We’re on good terms, and trust each other. In the summertime we each get two uninterrupted weeks with the kids.

For the past year, it’s become my new normal that has, ultimately, led to more gratitude for consecutive time spent with my children, more eagerness to be with the children, and more intentionality in the memories being made. I’m making it as positive of an experience as I can, and I can say it’s nice to get to experience “Christmas Eve excitement” each Saturday.

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