Roger Goodell Warns Deshaun Watson Accusers They Have Until Stroke Of Midnight Before Magic Of Credible Allegations Disappears Forever

  • 📰 TheOnion
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 23 sec. here
  • 2 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 13%
  • Publisher: 51%

United States Headlines News

United States Latest News,United States Headlines

NEW YORK—Noting that time was running out, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell warned Deshaun Watson’s accusers Wednesday that they only have until the stroke of midnight before the magic of credible allegations disappear forever. “Take heart, my dears, for while you have the public’s ear now, be forewarned: When the clock…

NEW YORK—Noting that time was running out, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell warned Deshaun Watson’s accusers Wednesday that they only have until the stroke of midnight before the magic of credible allegations disappear forever.

“Take heart, my dears, for while you have the public’s ear now, be forewarned: When the clock strikes twelve, your time to be taken seriously will vanish!” said Goodell, adding that the accusers behind the more than 20 sexual harassment and sexual misconduct civil lawsuits filed against the Houston Texans quarterback had only a matter of hours before any chance at securing public support or any productive legal outcome would disappear forever.

 

Thank you for your comment. Your comment will be published after being reviewed.
Please try again later.

The accusers have had over 7 months of until the stroke of midnights and 7 months of full day lights to come with that crooked, no good, dirty lawyer and tell tell the nation this has been nothing but a scheme to rob Deshaun of his paycheck. Call the law or I will.

Deshaun Watson just might get that Happy Ending.

“Stroke of midnight” is a bit too on-the-nose here.

I'm pretty sure there's an internal NFL memo called the Fairy Godmother...not to be confused with the Hail Mary memo

Salagadoola mechicka boola bibbidi-bobbidi-fool

I always stroke at midnight

Im surprised they don’t just do what they did with Ben Rothlisberger; give him a 6 game suspension and be done with it.

It's a good thing I don't know who the hell Roger Goodell and Deshaun Watson are. Otherwise, I might have ended up posting some bit of sarcasm that would have proven me too witty to write for The Onion.

I know we all probably must have heard about Bitcoin but don't know how it works, I tried it in a week ago by a man who recommended me to JULIE_FX_TRADER on Twitter she guides me through and i made a return of $20,500 after a week of trading, connect with her

We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

 /  🏆 724. in US

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

Roger Goodell wrong to hold back NFL report on WFT—whistleblowers' lawyerThe NFL chief said information about the probe was not released because those who came forward wanted to have their identities protected.
Source: Newsweek - 🏆 468. / 52 Read more »

Roger Goodell wrong to hold back NFL report on WFT—whistleblowers' lawyerThe NFL chief said information about the probe was not released because those who came forward wanted to have their identities protected.
Source: Newsweek - 🏆 468. / 52 Read more »

Travis Barker Just Got Kourtney Kardashian’s Lips Tattooed on His ArmHe added yet another permanent tribute to his fiancée onto his body and we're into it 💋
Source: Allure_magazine - 🏆 473. / 51 Read more »

The 14 Best Hair Removal Products To Get Skin Like A Baby Seal*Lovingly strokes face* So…like fur? 🦭
Source: ELLE Magazine (US) - 🏆 472. / 51 Read more »

London's Heathrow says full travel recovery at least five years awayLondon's Heathrow Airport does not expect air traffic to recover completely until at least 2026, with the number of passengers travelling through Britain's biggest airport well below pre-pandemic levels despite a pick-up in the past three months.
Source: Reuters - 🏆 2. / 97 Read more »

Has Covid-19 Changed Cities Forever? Probably Not.Cities will survive, but the pandemic will hit different industries and parts of the workforce unevenly, with consequences for cities’ economic and social health, and inequality. ᒪᗴᑌǤᗴᑎᗩᗩᖇᔕ, ᗰᗴᗪᎥᗩ ᐯᎥᖇᑌᔕ ᗴᑎ ᗰᗴᗪᎥᗩ Ǥᗴᛕ丅ᗴ, ǤᗴᑎᗝᗴǤ Ꭵᔕ ǤᗴᑎᗝᗴǤ
Source: Forbes - 🏆 394. / 53 Read more »