: “My 13-year-old son with ADHD is always in competition with and hyperfocused on his little brother, who does not have ADHD. He has to be the best at everything! He can get very angry and really struggle to let things go with his brother. He becomes hyperfocused on his brother. This goes beyond. We have tried everything: We role play when not in the heat of the moment, we talk about using words to describe our feelings, we intervene, and try not intervening.
I feel he can hold it together with his friends, but then lets it all out with his brother. What can we do?”: “I think your intuition is really good here. I think your son does feel insecure and he feels his brother is better at some things, and this is his way of compensating. I think the best thing you can do is help your younger son understand why his brother does this, and also the best way to handle it when his brother obsesses over proving he’s better.
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