: “My daughter has a pattern of not telling the truth. She will be quite convincing — even with this Momma, who has a well-honed lie meter. We are now encouraging her to tell the truth, without punishment, and then rewarding her truthfulness. She continues to impulsively do something and then cover her tracks with lies. I am afraid this impulsive behavior will not abate as she gets older. Telling the truth is a strong value in our family and I am not sure what else we can do.
The issue isn’t that she intended to lie, but that the task she was given to do was either too hard, too big, or too complicated — she didn’t know where to begin, so she froze. And when push comes to shove, some kids would rather lie and face those consequences than try to do what is being asked. Bottom line? For some kids withHow you respond to the lying makes all the difference in the world.
My best advice is to give it time. Keep doing what you are doing. And continue to work with your daughter to build the necessary problem-solving skills she needs to minimize the lying.
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