Pole Dancing Helped Me Regain Control of My Life

Photo-Illustration: The Cut; Videos: Getty The past two years have been busy: I moved from New York City back to my hometown in Pennsylvania, got engaged, planned a wedding, adopted a dog, bought a house, got married, and started an endless list of DIY home-improvement projects. It’s been … a lot. Still, once or twice a week, I head to my local studio, lather up with dry-hands lotion, and pull myself onto the pole. It is the one place I can always rely on to feel calm and in control.

I started spending more and more time at the studio. My now-husband had just started a job that took up almost all of his time — the only signs of life I saw from him were crumbs in our kitchen from his early-morning breakfasts — and my job wasn’t going particularly well. Pole was the only thing I looked forward to, so I kept going even though I wasn’t particularly good. It started as something to fill up my time and be with other girls similar to me, but it became my sanctuary.

I really began to embrace my identity as a pole dancer. I got a pole at home — it took 10 minutes to set up and break down in the living room of my tiny apartment — and began posting videos from class on Instagram, which quickly expanded my community in the sport. Eventually, I decided it was time to work on a routine to compete at one of the Pole Sport Organization’s competitions, which vary in size but ultimately allow pole dancers at all levels to compete across the country.

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