"They let their fear of dealing with their own trauma turn into causing mine and ignoring it.""They left me to my own devices so long as my grades were good. They didn't teach me much of anything outside of knowing right from wrong. Outside of being kept alive, I pretty much raised myself.""My parents were completely apathetic and never got involved in my siblings' lives or mine.
"It actually had the opposite effect. Once my marks in a specific class started slipping, I just kind of gave up. I'm going to get yelled at for a 70 just as bad as a 50, and a 50 is easier to get.""Often, when my brother fucked up in school, my mom would say to him something like, 'Why can’t you be more like your brother?'"
"I can say it has not exactly given him the confidence of a champion, even though he’s really talented. My mom says she regrets saying it.""They played favorites. They always made me feel like I was inadequate because I wasn’t like my brother.""They withheld certain foods, like biscuits, cakes, and sweets, apart from the likes of birthdays. As soon as we were old enough and were given school food money, we went nuts for sugar and hid it from our parents.
"It took years to get it back under control. I still have issues now. I genuinely feel that if it was more a case of 'everything in moderation,' we wouldn’t have had the issues we now have.""They gave me too much guilt and shame. Those are not motivational forces for me to be 'better.' In fact, quite the opposite was true."And"It was the 'You're too emotional and you could get bullied for it' talk I got from my dad in early elementary school.
"Processing emotions now is a struggle, and talking through how I'm feeling with my wife is almost impossible, partly because it's hard even for me to tell sometimes."What are some of the biggest mistakes your parents made while raising you? Let us know in the comments section.
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