Ten Ways to Tell if You’re Too Hard on Yourself

Model . According to the S-REF model, it’s not so much the content of what you think when you’re being self-critical, but “the mechanisms that generate, monitor, and maintain the process of worry and rumination” . In other words, your focus on your flaws can morph into the process of thinking there’s something wrong with you for blaming yourself for these flaws.

The researchers compared the responses of the experimental to two control groups, one of whom received the math task but didn’t read self-critical statements. The key measure for this comparison was a scale assessing psychological distress. As predicted, the students in the math failure/self-criticism experimental group had the highest distress scores compared to controls.

I need to repeatedly think about things that I got wrong in order to avoid making mistakes in the future.Repeatedly reviewing how I should have acted differently in the past shows that I care about the outcome.Not spending sufficient time thinking about past mistakes and failures will make me arrogantI have a hard time distancing myself from thoughts about not being good enough.These ten items divide into two subscales.

Why do we always focus on the negative? We should not have to dig so deep for the positive things. Life would be brighter, if we kept the positive items at the front of our minds.

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