New Claritin Flamethrower Incinerates Whatever Causing Allergies

You guys need to make a video ad for that with the same vibes as kitchen gun.

robdelaney finally

I could use this.

steveschale Wait. The Onion is back!

*New & Improved for California:

Bless you!

But I’m allergic to cats... OH GOD...

Poor kitty 😺😔

MollyWissinger

I was wondering if there were any side effects, thank you for claritin, I mean, clarifying that. So for the people that drinks that's good information. Other than that, it's all cool and wonderful! wait......not cool, just wonderful

kmcosgrove115 lol!!!

excellent. im allergic to spiders

marci_belton

One can only dream

Susan_Ivey

My daughter is going to be so excited she doesn't need to eat those chewables anymore

I'll take 5.

I'm allergic to billionaires, does it work on them too?

themissjenn

Please please make it true and where do I get one?

satire

Don't for a minute think that some whippersnapper in marketing hasn't brought this up in a meeting 'Agent Orange DM' for example

damicobrian

But do you need a prescription ?

I was literally just contemplating burning my lawns...

I NEED this. No longer will I have to take an allegra just because someone showed up to work with cat hair on their sweater.

“Non-drowsy” indeed!

This is legit.

Worked in WWII.

I'll TAKE ONE

jkramon1313 Dual-purposed: good in the winter also.

I love those shoes.

New Claritin Flamethrower Incinerates Anyone Not Wearing Mask

Will my FSA card cover this?

Crap I’m allergic to smoke.

I would buy that

Time to destroy everything that's making me feel sick af /lh But not you bees and ants, yall fine. WASPS HOWEVER, IM COMIN FOR YA

Also, works great on bug control, and snow removal during winter months!

I'll take two please 🤣

GlitchesRoux Soon... it will all be clear.

imade pun about lawn mowers today

It's only prescription though.

Exactly! Cut 👏🏽 out 👏🏽 the 👏🏽 middle 👏🏽 man!

Useless I’m allergic to ash and soot too.

What about my Solar urticaria?🤔

In Romania people could receive a fine if they don't eradicate Ragweed (Ambrosia) from their yard.

Toast that front yard! No more grass to cut!

Need it!

Its about time,I'm tired of them damn lil pills....I wanna destroy something!

Need

Poundsign Finally

marie_jolly6 our insurance covers this

Hey snopes, can you let me know if this is a real product? If it is, I'd really like to buy it.

Whatever it takes. Nuke it from orbit if you must. Nose is at DEFCON 3 might be 2 after I finish the laundry.

thefrug Got to be a joke. Why would anyone use this- entire towns have burned and they're trying to market this dangerous product?🙄

Thank you.

Thought this was an ad for the next Tarantino movie at first.

If it's safe to use on dogs with fleas I'll take it. Even it's not safe.

joey_culoper My allergies are this bad, I wish this was a thing.

TrevyChase_ ReyRaymundo W2theILL

Oh cool this thing is the perfect solution to roommates cat!

is it possible to return our Claritin minigun for one of the flamethrowers? We’ve already dealt with our 40 to 50 hogs so it seems like overkill at this point

this will help with my cat and dog allergies

Yes. Perfect. Bye bye kitty

mrsombudsman the next logical step

Well, I don’t know many people who can breath smoke either.

What if I'm allergic to fires :c

With ephedrine I hope!

For your birthday avazukowski16 🥳

Seems a bit harsh but ok

Oh, finally.

I’m allergic to pet dander

LivelyKels u need this

Is this effective for pet allergies?

p_vega15 should we get this for you?

Claritin clearer

Use only QuentinTarantino approved flamethrowers! 🔥 [;) OnceUponATimeInHollywood

something something ELON MUSK something something NOT A FLAMETHROWER

😻

LOL

WinterRae82

Finally a Claritin that works!

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