NASA Issues Formal Apology For 1969 Genocide Of Moon Natives

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WASHINGTON—Saying the long-overdue gesture was a step towards atoning for the space agency’s past transgressions, NASA issued a formal apology Wednesday for the 1969 genocide of the moon’s native population. “The time has come to recognize NASA’s detestable role in the massacre of the moon’s original inhabitants,” said NASA spokesperson Natalie Warheit, adding that the blood of countless indigenous moon natives would forever be on the organization’s hands. “When we first set foot upon the moon, we found a thriving and peaceful civilization that welcomed our astronauts as friends and even worshipped Neil Armstrong as a god. Shamefully, we exploited their trust by slaughtering thousands, indirectly killing even more by exposing them to Earth diseases against which they had no defense, and then burying them all in mass graves by the Mare Serenitatis basin. NASA apologizes unequivocally for these atrocities.” At press time, NASA had also issued an apology for its role in toppling the democratic government of Neptune during the Voyager 2 mission.

 

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Did they make an apology video?

Let me guess....small pox on the space blankets?

Adam Should Have Never Told Eve, 'The Moon Is Ours'.

🤣

It all started with that golf ball

And when will the FDA apologize for the massacre of the tobacco gnomes?!?! My people demand justice!

You're mistaking Moon for the continent you're tweeting this from.

jetcitystar Who was the first on the Moon? Our Mr. Brouček in the 19. Century or Cyrano de Bergerac,, those Russians did bombarded the Moon with Lunas in 1957 already.

FINALLY! Poor moonies.

Good joke

So did Beto!

Woke people will believe this is real.

This would be funny it it were not true. Sad SeeThemAliens

JasperCillessen Deeply ineffective, lunatics keep running the World.

That’s gross

Elizabeth Warren claims to have Moon colony ancestor.

Apologize? Why do those NASA socialists hate America?

No wonder we haven't found life on the moon. I knew they were covering it up to keep us here breeding with each other.

Why did the white man go to the moon? He thought there was land up there he could steal.

Well on the dark side (pun intended) we won’t have to worry about reparations.

This is why we raid

Errr... no. Just no

1969? Nice👍

It is nice to see America owning up to past wrongs.

Trump said if we didn't, we would have illegal moon people at our borders.

Ineffective genocide, world still run by lunatics.

Nice

Not accepted!

Our Congress Failed to protect them very sad

they should of had a moon wall

Not a coincidence they issued this apology being that the Area51 raid is coming up soon. TruthExpressComing NarutoRun

Never forgetti

Those damn moon whalers!

🙄oy vey....

Not so cheering, have to say..

They should never have boasted about their opium fields.

That is a reality that probably happed and is why we have yet to return to the scene of the crime.

Guess we'll have to wait another 45 years before Malaysia apologizes for that missing plane that crashed into their shrine.

Makes the stairway to heaven that much easier.

You do realize that Mormon founder Joseph Smith said that the Moon was inhabited by a race of “Moonmen”? I laugh every time I think of that. LDSquotable churchhistory DeseretNews Mormons

Area 51 revokes privileges from old white presidential men to hopefully stifle oncoming citizen raid.

nianiania .

The Space Force is coming, arm up, Moon Natives.

Reparations

At least American policy on native people is consistent.

That is really quite disturbing. Shame on you for making me laugh so hard. :D

I know it’s “fake moon people” but you could have toned the realism of this picture down a notch or two.

Also, the survivor children are up for adoption at Area 51

this seems inaccurate

That's what they get for squatting on America's Moon.

About time.

Pathetic of them to die to the common cold.

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