My Wife’s Racist Mom Moved In. I’m Worried About What It’s Costing Us.

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Dear Pay Dirt: This is brokered peace at best.

My mother has a boundaries problem. I am in my mid-20s and independence means a lot to me, but it feels like she’s stripping me of my agency. Here are some examples of ways she has trampled my boundary in the past seven days alone. My apartment’s leasing office kept sending us incorrect versions of the lease we needed to renew. She asked me if she could call them. I clearly said, “No, I can do this.” She called anyway and only told me afterward .

It’s up to you to determine how much your mom can and cannot intervene and there are several ways to do that. You have agency; you just have to use it!I have a strange question as it applies to a future endeavor. I am a mother of six—four are my stepkids and two are biological. I am looking into starting a tree nursery.

I want to purchase a beach condo to retire in. I cannot do this and be financially sound without selling the condo and asking her to move into public housing—which she worries over . Do you think it is selfish of me to ask her to move into public housing? I love my mom, but I do not think it is fair to have to house her and lose upwards of $1,000 a month and my retirement dream over it—especially considering that she is unsteady on her feet, lonely, and does not drive.

 

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