My Boyfriend Started Dating Me When I Was 16 And He Was 21 — Is He A Creep?

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“I’ve always kinda told myself we were an exception.”

Can there be exceptions where it's okay for an adult to date a teen? Well, the law in your state might say yes — but I vote no. Even the"happiest" of those relationships would be built on an imbalance of power and questionable consent from the teen. This is one area where I feel comfortable drawing a hard line, because the hard line protects young people from abuse.But if my math here is correct, you are currently 19, and your boyfriend is 24.

And here's another thing I can tell you: The fact that you were dealing with trauma at age 16 may have made you a more vulnerable target to this guy. Teenage years can be extremely unstable, tumultuous, and difficult. Good adults in your life will see that instability as a sign that you need help. Bad adults will see it as an opportunity to pounce.

 

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