: While my best friend and her partner do not believe in traditional marriage, they were married at city hall following the birth of their child to ensure the associated legal protections and privileges.Miss Manners: Is their kind offer because they don’t want to sit next to my kid?
We thought to have a little fun and purchased a hideous trinket from a thrift store. During the visit, I produced the wrapped gift with a smile and the explanation that every newlywed couple receives something that is not to their taste, and I didn’t see why they should have to miss out. The gift was put aside. On their last day, I unwrapped it and brought it to her to assure her it really was just a gag. I apologized that it didn’t land well.
While Miss Manners does find the premise for your joke nominally amusing, its practical application was confusing at best, even without the unnecessary insult your friend took from it. Was this response rude? Strictly speaking, it doesn’t violate the rule against telling someone that they are being rude, but it certainly gets that point across.Assuming it was as awful as you claim, Miss Manners thinks your colleague showed remarkable restraint.
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