Miss Manners: How to respond when a friend or family member has bad news?

Could you suggest alternative replies to “I’m sorry” when one hears bad or unsettling news from family or friends?

An alternative might be a simple “I understand,” “That’s rough” or “Oh my. Tell me about it,” depending on the exact situation.Not being so insensitive as to rebuff clear expressions of empathy. Obviously what it means, in that context, is that one is sorry that such a bad thing happened. One can feel sorry about many things without being the agent who caused them.But if we are going to be persnickety about kind remarks, Miss Manners can think of objections to your suggestions:“That’s rough” -- sounds flippant when applied to a tragedy.

When you are alone, you may attack your butter however you choose. Miss Manners is not peeking in your window.A few months ago, I had a local plumbing company come to my house for some drain cleaning and to have the main pipes snaked. It was a lot of work and a messy job. The company is very well known in the area and receives 4+ stars in customer reviews.

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