My husband and I have been married for two years, and we have almost completely stopped having sex. My husband claims he is still very physically attracted to me, but that he can’t act on it. When he can manage to try and start something physically, he either can’t get an erection or can’t finish. I know he has very bad anxiety issues, and he has told me that he often wants to have sex but then “gets so in his head that he sets himself up for failure.
Mostly, I’m not sure this is a problem. You perform oral sex, which you enjoy, on your partner until you’re tired and want to snuggle instead. It sounds like he’s amused, and certainly not upset with this arrangement. That seems great to me. We’ve got this procreation-driven script about sex that we’re still moving away from, and another orgasm-dominated script that is taking over. Sex is about the paragraph as much as the exclamation mark. You’ve found something that works really well for you.
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