I Moved Across The World To Be With A Guy I'd Spent Only 8 Days With. Here's Why.

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“I worried I was compromising my autonomy by moving to Kenya, but I was right about what I’d gain.”

In 2017, I was living in Guatemala, working as a grant writer for an agriculture nonprofit. I rarely went to the U.S., but that October the nonprofit sent me to the Forbes 30 Under 30 summit in Boston.

After months of anxiety, inspiration struck: I would take time off to travel in Asia. I’d long been interested in the region and this was an opportunity to go. Travel often brings clarity and I thought the journey could help me figure things out. Plus, there’s a lot of development work in Asia ― perhaps I’d stay ― so I bought a one-way ticket to Hong Kong.A week before my departure, something happened that surpassed serendipity and touched what some would call fate.

Daniel’s father was from Hong Kong, so the next day we visited his great-grandparents’ graves. Keeping tradition, we bowed three times before we left. It was an intense way to get to know someone: short bursts of intimate time, sharing hotel rooms in different foreign settings. Our relationship had mainly developed through words on a screen, and here we were, pooping in the same bathroom. His physical presence was always a shock at first, like my favorite character had jumped off the TV screen. But then it was comfortable, easy.

I thought about Daniel on trains and buses as I wound through Southeast Asia. I sent him photos and videos of my Vietnamese notes or hitchhiking in Cambodia, of misty temples and jaw-dropping mountains and all the wonderful things one sees and does while traveling.

 

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