The frequency of this urge, this chorus of comments, was jarring and confusing and frustrating. I’d clench my teeth at every “just wait” mom, bracing for what I knew was coming. Instead of being helpful—which I think, or hope, is the intended purpose—these warnings of what terrible things are waiting around the corner instill anxiety and feed our insecurities.
, it’s to be in the moment, instead of worrying about a world I can’t control—and to be grateful for the fascinating, heart-exploding distraction right in front of me.When my daughter, Lucy, was 14 months old, we went to pick up the mail at our old rental. The tenant greeted me at the door, with a fresh newborn tucked into her neck.
Then it hit me: the just-waiters aren’t terrible, mean moms with malicious intentions. They mean well, but they want their. They want you to know that they’ve been there, and survived that phase, and the next one, and the next. And they want you to know it’s not all joyous—far from it. They also know how fast it goes, even if it doesn’t feel like it when you’re in the trenches of momming.
Instead of “just wait until your baby is mobile and you can’t look away for a second—you’ll never sit down again,” try: “When they learn to walk, your kid’s world opens up. They’ll explore movement and be able to better communicate what they want and what they’re interested in—just wait.”
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