Illustration: Pedro Nekoi About a dozen times in the last two weeks, I have dreamt that Amy Coney Barrett is homophobically berating me. I feel absurd typing this, but I’ve lost dozens of hours of sleep and many REM cycles to this woman.
“Wha …” I murmur as my classmates giggle. “Where am I?” The giggles, now stoked, turn to full-on laughter. I bolt upright and cover my mouth and nose with the neck of my sweater. “Stop laughing!” I shout. “You’re spraying particles all over each other! Have you all lost your minds?”“The virus!” I reason. “Have you Madeline-ass cartoon characters forgotten about the goddamn virus?” No one has seen Madeline.
“Wait. I’m back in the fourth grade?” I say. I stare at my hands, flex my fingers, seeking purchase on reality. “Oh my God, 9/11 hasn’t even happened.” Sister Herman Mary stomps me in the face with her pilgrim shoe, the ones with the giant silver buckle on them or whatever it is nuns wear. “What did I say about God’s name?”
“Now, now,” she says. “You just need to pray, my child. Come, take my hand. Let’s head to the basilica. We can kneel down in the pew together.”“It will. You just need to pray.”Pray.And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
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