I just got dumped by my much younger girlfriend, and it still stings

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Relationship advice: As this reader wonders whether they’re dating the wrong type of people, there are lessons to learn about getting out of a bad situation and assessing future relationship prospects.

I dated “ Jess ” for several months. The relationship was short, but intense. We moved in together almost right away. She’s a lot younger than me. I’m 40ish and she’s in her mid-20s. But it didn’t feel like that mattered. We had a lot in common. We work together in the hospitality industry.

Bottom line, I’m bummed, I don’t know where to go from here. I slept on a friend’s couch last night. I really liked this girl. I definitely feel like I connect more with younger women but all my friends are telling me this is my fault for dating someone in her 20s. It’s like they’re blaming me and I feel like this takes away from the fact that I got totally played here and am frankly bummed about how this ended. I guess I’m looking for advice on how to move on and what to learn from this.

Because even advice from those who only want the best for you doesn’t really matter, does it? You want what you want: living like a 20-something and dating 20-somethings. Dizzily falling into short but intense love affairs fueled by crazy chemistry. Impulsively moving in together after a short time dating, much less knowing one another. Staying entrenched in an industry that’s full of late nights and wild surprises, a few ride-or-die compadres and a never-ending lineup of mysterious strangers.

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