I changed my name for the sake of my kids—and I regret it

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I wanted an official, obvious connection to my children for all the world to see, but doubling my last name turned out to be a massive error in judgment.

“Never mind. Thank you. I’ll just purchase new tickets.”. But it was important to him that we share a last name to avoid confusing our future children . I didn’t want to lose the name that had been mine for three decades, though. The solution?, no hyphen . In my mind, it was a fair and modern compromise. It turned out to be a massive error in judgment and an exercise in masochism that I’m forced to relive multiple times daily.

When I first made the change, the double last name felt weird and heavy in my mouth. When I saw my name in print, it didn’t look like my own . Despite my new health card, I would go to the doctor and use my maiden name because that’s what they knew . But then I got used to it. I’m not sure when, but today I use both names without even thinking about it. It feels like me again—an annoying, longer version of me, but me.

 

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