I Ate the Worst Salad of My Life in the Name of Art

Visitors to the Whitney can reflect among the produce. Photo: ANGELA WEISS/AFP via Getty Images Can you pinpoint the worst salad you’ve ever eaten? I can. And no, I did not attend Fyre Festival in 2017. Rather, I attended the new Darren Bader show at the Whitney Museum.

“Nature’s impeccable sculpture.” Photo: © Darren Bader. Image courtesy the artist and Andrew Kreps Gallery, New York Anyone who has accidentally blown an entire paycheck at Whole Foods will be no stranger to the enticing produce displays — but with no shopping list to distract you here, it’s easier to appreciate the variable hues and shapes of the edible artwork.

I arrived right on time for salad-eating, only to be met with 40 empty podiums and several perplexed patrons of the arts. People in New York are often described as hungry: hungry to see their name in lights, to snag that corner office, or just survive the urban wilderness. The hunger I saw in the eyes of floor-eight visitors was neither metaphorical nor literary. “Where’s the salad? WHERE’S THE SALAD?” implored impeccably dressed Korean tourists and rainbow-haired art students.

Soon, chaos erupted. “Are they putting the fruit in WITH the vegetables?” a horrified woman in a knit hat asked. Indeed, all 40 uncooked, uncomplimentary ingredients were thrown together in a single silver bowl. I heard gasps as potato, butternut squash, and yuca root were added to the raw slaw.

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