How to Curb Defiant Behavior in Children

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Why praising your child for doing things right and positive reinforcement may be more effective than punishment and yelling, writes DrDanielleDick

Counterintuitively, focusing on positive behavior, rather than behavior that needs improvement, is more effective at increasing good behavior.Problem-solving with your child to find a solution together is the most effective way to address challenging behavior.

Sigh, we’ve all been there. The temper tantrum at Target. The request to bring in the dinner plate that gets met with crossed arms and staunch refusal. The dilly-dallying that makes it seemingly impossible to get out the door in the morning. Why can’t our children just do the simple things we ask?!The Child Code

Those scenarios probably generated a pretty unpleasant reaction, but that’s what we do with our children. We have the good intention of trying to shape their behavior in positive ways—just like the nightmare partner or boss did—but it’s completely ineffective becauselikes someone constantly pointing out all our areas for improvement. It’s just too much, so it inspires no change in the intended direction.challenge: for the next day, try to comment only on your child’s good behavior.

 

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Deep. Spear the Rod and Spoil the child?

Show Your Feelings When Rewarding Your Child. When your child does something that you like, reward him by nodding 🙂🙏🏽

100%! As a BHP we exclusively used a strengths-based approach to reinforce good effort and behavior while ignoring (when safe) problem behaviors. Sometimes for kids coming from exclusively punishment-based environments. It makes a world of difference.

🥰

Wow, what a fucking shock. Treating your kids with love and respect instead of with fear and intimidation leads to kids that have healthy emotional responses instead of fucked up coping mechanisms! Who could have ever guessed.

works for cats too...just saying

DrDanielleDick Havent we known this for a while? Most effective is positive reinforcement and praise for positive behavioir, along with clear boundaries and firm but fair consequences that are relatable to the negative behaviour.

DrDanielleDick With the caveat that parents are engaged in discipline versus punishment. It only works if consequences are clear and followed consistently. We got rid of spanking (good) and replaced it with the time out. It only works if it happens.

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