How to avoid maskless people in airplanes: 'Wanna hear about my testicle-tanning regimen?'

  • 📰 USATODAY
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 52 sec. here
  • 2 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 24%
  • Publisher: 63%

United States Headlines News

United States Latest News,United States Headlines

.RexHuppke says 'most Americans want masks on planes' and suggests ways to avoid those without masks in a column for usatodayopinion

So people are going to make their own decisions, and I respect that. But I have come up with a few tips for those of us who favor masks. Using any of these techniques will likely create a safe “social-distancing zone” around you and encourage mask-free travelers to keep away.You’re welcome, America.

1) If an unmasked traveler is about to take the seat next to you, greet your new seatmate like this: “Hi, my name is Rex Huppke. I see we’ll be seated next to each other on today’s flight and you’ve decided not to wear a face mask. I’m looking forward to spending the next two hours talking to you loudly about my testicle-tanning regimen! I heard about it from Tucker Carlson, and I have to say, my testosterone levels have never been higher.

2) If the first item doesn’t work for you because you have scruples or don’t have testicles, tanned or otherwise, try a different but equally effective greeting: “Hey, great to see you.

4) If you spot a string of unmasked people walking down the aisle toward your row of seats, immediately remove your shoes and socks and take out a foot file. As they get closer, commence Operation Pedicure.6) Politely ask any unmasked people near you if they would mind wearing a face mask, at least until the flight is airborne and the filtration system is running at full speed.

 

Thank you for your comment. Your comment will be published after being reviewed.
Please try again later.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion You guys are some full of s&$! One person on my flight of 200 had their mask on. Why do you think your paper will be extinct in 5 years

RexHuppke usatodayopinion They're losing their last bastion of delusion, it must be painful.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion False

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Lol. Ya ok

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Then he's an idiot & in denial & hasnt see all the mask incidents over the past year. CLEARLY people do NOT want them. IT IS NOT MY, NOR ANYONES RESPONSIBILITY TO PROTECT YOUR HEALTH. ONLY - YOU - ARE RESPONSIBILE, SO - YOU - wear the mask, your choice.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion If a person is that worried about possibly getting sick then they should stay locked up in their homes and pray to Fauci.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion B/S they do. Even if it were true, which it’s not, they can wear them. Case closed.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion It polling at 72% in favor of lifting mask mandates.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Do people get paid for writing this stuff?

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Total BS

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Most?

RexHuppke usatodayopinion No they don't.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion It's a good thing we have ol' Rex around to tell us what 'most Americans' want!

RexHuppke usatodayopinion

RexHuppke usatodayopinion Most Americans are DONE with masks.

RexHuppke usatodayopinion If most Americans want to wear masks on planes, there is nothing stopping them from wearing one.

We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

 /  🏆 100. in US

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

That Tucker Carlson Testicle-Tanning Video Is Goop for BrosThe New Abnormal hosts MollyJongFast and andylevy break down Tucker Carlson's testicle-tanning segment that was so inane that even Kid Rock wanted nothing to do with it. “He’s turned into like a male version of Goop,' said Levy. MollyJongFast andylevy WHERE IS realGonzaloLira ?!?!?! MollyJongFast andylevy MollyJongFast andylevy 🤣😂🤣 Thank you for making me giggle!
Source: thedailybeast - 🏆 307. / 63 Read more »

Most people in US want masks for travelers: AP-NORC pollA poll finds that a majority of people in the United States continue to support a mask requirement for people traveling on airplanes and other shared transportation Well then most people can wear them on their own. If you want to wear a mask, wear one. Wear two. Geezus.
Source: WOKVNews - 🏆 247. / 63 Read more »

Most people in US want masks for travelers: AP-NORC pollDo you agree with this poll? A new poll finds that a majority of Americans continue to support a mask requirement for people traveling on airplanes and other shared transportation Yes. why don’t you go do some reporting at the airport? Count mask vs no mask. Was there today. Less then 10% wearing a mask. That poll is ridiculous did TexasTribune do the poll? Mask optional. Everyone’s vaccinated right?
Source: ksatnews - 🏆 442. / 53 Read more »

Most people in US want masks for travelers: AP-NORC pollThe continued support among Americans overall for mandating masks on transportation comes even as worries about COVID-19 are among their lowest points of the past two years. Then they should wear one! More proof we are being governed by a loud minority. I call BS on that poll. I have witnessed in the airport and on multiple flights no more than 10% maximum of people masked
Source: AKNewsNow - 🏆 460. / 53 Read more »

Reader Asks: Should I Sell The Municipal Bonds I Inherited From My Father?Some people are so avid about avoiding taxes that they make big mistakes with their portfolios. Unless we get another pandemic or go to war, yes or sell the bonds and buy yourself a nice piece of property and rent that bish out
Source: Forbes - 🏆 394. / 53 Read more »