Dear Abby: Why are all the men I date so dumb?

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Dear Abby weighs in on middle-aged dating, friend’s husbands, and significant others at funerals.

I’m a 57-year-old, attractive, single, childless woman. Why is it that the men I meet are just plain dumb? They have the conversational skills of 5-year-olds and the same juvenile behavior. They are either emotionally unavailable and just after sex, or at the opposite end of the spectrum — available emotionally, but the sex is just … okay. I cannot be the first woman to ask the question: Are boys just dumb?the first. With the advent of social media, people’s social skills began declining.

You might have better luck if you try to meet men whose values more closely mirror your own. Do some volunteering, take a class or join a group activity you enjoy. As to your disappointment in the sexual performance of the men in your past who were emotionally available: Try to remember that men are teachable creatures and often eager to please, if you are willing to communicate what you need. Perhaps the problem is that those communication skills could use some polishing.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

 

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