Dear Abby: Stepmom has been controlling Dad for 35 years. It’s too late to change now

My dad, who is nearing 80, has been married to my stepmom, “Ruth,” for nearly 35 years. She has always been temperamental and controlling to a degree, but during the last few years it has become abundantly clear that she’s emotionally abusive to my dad.

The list is long, sad and frustrating. He forbids me to confront her, but it is giving me daily stress because I love my dad and I fear her control is something he has grown accustomed to. Any advice?As repugnant as the situation may be to you, I do not think you should try to reduce your stress by creating more for your father. He has forbidden you from confronting his wife about her hypercontrolling behavior, and you should respect his wishes.

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