Dear Abby: I’m impatient for him to say he loves me

From what you have written, he demonstrates it often. His answer may be enlightening and could affect whether you proceed with your plans.My husband and I divorced when our only son was 3. We had joint custody. Our marriage ended because of my husband’s binge drinking, secrecy, verbal abuse and one incident of domestic violence.

At 14, my son chose to live with his father. Now he’s 30, and his dad and stepmother have alienated him from me. When I see him, there is always underlying hostility.I attend Al-Anon meetings and have made myself geographically available to him over the last eight years. He visits briefly, once or twice every six months. I have offered to go to counseling with him. He has a counselor but never invites me to come. I would pay for one, but my son says he’s too busy to do more.

There is a saying in AA, “Let go and let God.” For the sake of your own emotional well-being, it is time to do that.We live next door to a nice Jewish family, with three precious kids who seem to really like us old retirees. I had planned to make a Passover cake for them and had input on how to prepare kosher. However, I am having second thoughts.

Should I send a card telling them I’d like to prepare something? Or should I go ahead and prepare it anyway? Or should I just send a Passover greeting instead?A card might be the wiser way to go. Before you go to the expense of buying the ingredients, talk with the wife. Tell her what you are planning and find out how “strictly kosher” the family is.

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